Big fucking deal

Quoth Wikipedia:

Big data[1][2] is a collection of data sets so large and complex that it becomes difficult to process using on-hand database management tools or traditional data processing applications. The challenges include capture, curation, storage,[3] search, sharing, transfer, analysis,[4] and visualization. The trend to larger data sets is due to the additional information derivable from analysis of a single large set of related data, as compared to separate smaller sets with the same total amount of data, allowing correlations to be found to “spot business trends, determine quality of research, prevent diseases, link legal citations, combat crime, and determine real-time roadway traffic conditions.”

Now what if we get tired of the current hype cycle?

Big fucking deal[1][2] is a collection of deals so fucking large and complex that it becomes difficult to process using on-hand fuck giving tools or traditional shit giving techniques. The challenges include capture, curation, storage,[3] search, sharing, transfer, analysis,[4] and all kinds of who the fuck knows what else. The trend to larger fucking deals is due to the additional shit derivable from giving a fuck about a single large fucking pile of related shit, as compared to separate smaller piles with the same total amount of bullshit, allowing correlations to be found to “spot business shit, determine quality of whatever, prevent some nasty shit, link legal shit right the fuck together, combat fucking crime no I am not making this up it’s like fucking Batman, and determine real-time traffic shittiness.”
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4 comments on “Big fucking deal
  1. BMeph says:

    Let me guess: someone switched your tea over to decaf? 8D

    Still, nice job on the useless fluff-word winnowing – you wield a fine pitchfork, indeed!

  2. bbb says:

    This made my shitty day…

  3. Thorsten Claus says:

    Very nice, can I rebase that?

  4. sinelaw says:

    Hah! Your version is actually easier to understand. Made me laugh.

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